There are few things more deflating than walking into work each day under the weight of knowing your boss doesn’t believe in you. It can be subtle, like a dismissive look when you share an idea, a tendency to assign the most menial tasks while giving meaningful projects to others, or the constant undercurrent of skepticism in every interaction. Sometimes it is overt, in words that cut directly: “I don’t think you’re ready,” “I don’t see you as leadership material,” or worse, “You don’t belong here.” For anyone working in healthcare, where the stakes are high and the hours are long, this kind of environment can feel suffocating.
And yet, many physicians, nurses, and healthcare professionals can tell a story of enduring such treatment at some point in their careers. A doctor recently reflected on her own past, sharing how one of her superiors made it abundantly clear that he didn’t think she was qualified for the role she was in. His lack of faith in her abilities weighed heavily, seeping into her confidence, and making her wonder if she truly belonged. But what her story also revealed was resilience: she persevered, built her reputation through consistent work, and eventually realized that her superior’s judgment was more about his perspective than her actual capabilities.
When someone in power doubts you, it’s tempting to shrink. Self-doubt creeps in, and every misstep feels amplified by the possibility that they are keeping score. But it is also a crucible moment; a test of how you respond when validation is withheld. One path is to crumble, internalizing their lack of confidence as your truth. The other is to decide, often quietly, that their opinion will not define your trajectory. Many who have been through it can attest: the act of choosing to show up, day after day, and perform at a high level becomes its own form of resistance. The work itself becomes the evidence that outlasts someone else’s doubt.
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It is also important to remember that a superior’s skepticism does not necessarily reflect your actual skill set. Sometimes, it reflects their biases. Gender, race, age, or educational background can all play into how “qualified” someone is perceived to be, regardless of their true abilities. In medicine especially, where leadership roles have historically been dominated by men, women often report having to work twice as hard to be seen as equally competent. When a boss doesn’t like you or dismisses you, it is crucial to separate what belongs to them (their assumptions, their discomfort, their blind spots) from what belongs to you: your training, your effort, and your growth.
Of course, separating yourself from their perception doesn’t make the situation easy. It requires strategies for survival. For some, that means cultivating allies in the workplace who do see and value their contributions. A supportive colleague, a mentor in another department, or even a peer outside the organization can provide balance when your immediate superior refuses to. For others, it means documenting successes, keeping a personal record of accomplishments that can serve as a reminder of progress when doubt feels overwhelming. These records also serve a practical purpose should you need to advocate for yourself in formal reviews or applications for new roles.
There is also power in setting boundaries. While professionalism demands respect for superiors, it does not require tolerating disrespect. Learning to respond with calm firmness (acknowledging feedback where appropriate, but refusing to absorb hostility) can preserve dignity. In healthcare, where patient care must remain the top priority, it can feel risky to push back, but often it is less about confrontation and more about holding onto your own sense of worth.
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For some, the path forward eventually means moving on, which can mean seeking a new department, a new hospital, or even building a private practice where their skills and leadership are recognized. While not everyone has the flexibility to make a drastic change quickly, holding onto the knowledge that you are not bound forever to someone else’s negative opinion can make the daily challenges more bearable.
And there is always the long game to consider. Bosses come and go. Supervisors retire, move on, or get replaced. But your reputation, your work ethic, and your skills remain. Many professionals can look back years later and see that the superior who once seemed so powerful was just a temporary figure in their larger journey. The relationships built with patients, colleagues, and the wider medical community often last far longer than a single manager’s shadow.
(Take a listen to the following commentary, here, posted on social media on the topic, by a physician named Nicole Van Groningen, MD)
When your boss doesn’t believe in you, it is undeniably painful. It chips at confidence and makes the grind of medicine feel heavier than it already is. But it also provides an opportunity to define yourself apart from their opinion. To recognize that confidence, like skill, can be built brick by brick. To understand that your worth is not determined by one person’s perception. And, in time, to discover that sometimes the best way to respond to doubt is not with argument, but with persistence.
For women in particular, these stories resonate deeply. They remind us that leadership is not always given, but is often forged in the fire of skepticism. Which is why we’re excited to invite you to our 2nd annual Leadership for Women in Healthcare Online Conference, (you can also access the first annual event on the same subject, but with different lecture topics and discussions). It will be a space to share these stories, learn strategies, and connect with others who know what it means to rise, even when someone in power didn’t think you could.
It is important to remember that a superior’s skepticism does not necessarily reflect your actual skill set. Sometimes, it reflects their biases.
